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Do Men or Women Cheat More? Here’s What Numbers Say

Lily Evans - July 8, 2025

Image of a man secretly texting someone while hugging his girlfriend, depicting cheating in a relationship.

Cheating is one of the most emotionally explosive topics in any relationship. It’s also one of the most Googled. 

Whether you’ve been betrayed or are just curious, there’s a question that always comes up: do men or women cheat more? The answer isn’t simple. It depends on how you define cheating, where you look, and which generation you’re talking about.

For example, historically, men cheat more than women in relationships. It’s the same in the US, too. However, recent data points out that younger generations are rewriting relationship norms, and the old gender gap in infidelity is narrowing.

In this guide, we’ll dig into the latest data, explore how and why men and women cheat differently, and show you how you can reveal truths your partner might be hiding.

Do Men or Women Cheat More in the U.S.?

When it comes to cheating in committed relationships, men have long held the lead. Yet, the gap isn’t as wide as many assume.

According to data, about 20% of married men in the U.S. report having had sex with someone other than their spouse. For women, the number is roughly 13%. This pattern has been observed across multiple studies, including the General Social Survey and research from both private investigations and mental health groups.

The difference is also affected by how infidelity is defined. Some surveys include emotional affairs, sexting, or other non-physical behaviors, which can shift the numbers upward for both genders while maintaining the same directional trend.

How Infidelity Varies by Age and Gender

The question “Do men or women cheat more?” shifts depending on your age group. While men report higher overall rates of infidelity, younger women briefly lead the stats before the trend flips and widens in favor of men.

Among 18–29-year-olds, about 11% of women report cheating, compared to 10% of men. But by their 30s, men begin to cheat more often, and that pattern persists for decades. In their 60s, about 29% of men admit to infidelity, the highest for any group, while women peak earlier, around 17% in their 50s.

By the 70–79 age range, men still report high rates at 26%, while women’s cheating rates decline to 10% or less. This widening gender gap in older adults is one of the most consistent patterns in U.S. infidelity data. Experts also note that relationship length, life dissatisfaction, and changes in health often play roles in late-life affairs.

The reasons behind these numbers vary:

  • Men are more likely to cheat with strangers, coworkers, or casual flings.
  • Women are more likely to cheat with someone they already know, usually seeking emotional intimacy.

The bottom line? While the numbers may favor men, the emotional and psychological patterns reveal just how much context matters.

In either case, infidelity usually signals a deeper breakdown in trust, connection, or communication. Want to know if your partner may be hiding something? Our reverse phone lookup tool can help you see who they’ve been texting or who’s texting them back.

Why Men and Women Cheat: Psychology Behind the Stats

While the numbers tell us how many people cheat, the reasons behind it often reveal why specific trends exist between men and women. The motivations aren’t always the same, and they’re rarely as simple as just wanting something new.

Why Men Cheat

Men are more likely to cheat for physical or ego-driven reasons. Studies suggest the top reasons include:

  • Sexual dissatisfaction or unmet physical needs in their current relationship.
  • Desire for variety or thrill-seeking behavior.
  • Opportunity, especially in the workplace or travel situations.
  • Low impulse control or underdeveloped emotional coping skills.

According to several surveys, men who cheat aren’t necessarily looking to leave their partners. They often want to “supplement” the relationship, not replace it.

Why Women Cheat

Women are more likely to cheat for emotional reasons. Top drivers include:

  • Emotional neglect or feeling unappreciated by their partner.
  • Loneliness within a long-term relationship.
  • Desire for deeper intimacy or validation.
  • Revenge cheating often occurs after a betrayal or when resentment builds.

Studies show that, unlike men, women who cheat are more likely to consider leaving their current partner, especially if the affair involves an emotional bond.

Emotional Cheating, Tech, and the Gray Area

Not all infidelity is physical. In fact, emotional cheating is becoming more common and often just as damaging. When someone forms a deep emotional connection outside their relationship and starts hiding it, it can cross lines that feel just as serious as sex.

Emotional affairs often begin innocently, often through late-night conversations, venting about a partner, or constant messaging with someone new. Over time, it creates a parallel relationship that siphons intimacy from the main one.

With smartphones, social media, and encrypted messaging apps, emotional cheating is easier than ever to hide. Direct messages on Instagram, Snapchat streaks, “close friends” stories, or even frequent texting with an ex can all be signs. And for many people, discovering these interactions hurts more than a one-time physical betrayal.

In a digital world, how someone uses their phone can be more telling than what they say to your face. If you’ve noticed suspicious behavior, like sudden secrecy, deleted threads, or constant notifications, you don’t have to feel powerless. Learn how to check the signs discreetly with our in-depth guide on how to see your boyfriend’s text messages without his phone.

The Role of Relationship Stage, Marriage, and Cohabitation

Cheating doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Reports show that it often correlates with the stage and structure of a relationship. One of the clearest patterns in infidelity research? Unmarried people cheat more than married ones, especially when looking at men across all age groups.

That doesn’t mean marriage makes people immune to cheating. About 20% of married men and 13% of married women in the U.S. admit to infidelity. However, in the long term, non-married relationships, especially cohabiting ones, can sometimes blur the boundaries due to the lack of formal commitment. 

Marriage often comes with clearer expectations and societal pressure, which can act as guardrails. Still, even those guardrails can break if trust hasn’t been fully established. That’s why it’s crucial to go into a relationship with your eyes open.

If you’re starting to get serious with someone, run through our pre-relationship checklist. It covers red flags, background checks, and conversation prompts that could save you from heartbreak later.

How to Spot a Cheater Before It’s Too Late

Cheaters rarely come with a warning label. But they almost always leave behind clues. The key is learning how to recognize them before the damage is done.

Here are some of the most common red flags to watch out for:

  • Increased phone secrecy: If your partner suddenly guards their phone like it’s classified, starts deleting texts, or takes every call in another room, that’s more of an evasion tactic, not a privacy issue.
  • Defensive behavior: Asking simple questions like “Where were you?” or “Who’s that?” shouldn’t trigger outbursts. If they immediately turn things around on you or get angry for no reason, they might be hiding something.
  • Changed routines: New “workouts,” frequent late meetings, or spontaneous weekend plans that don’t make sense could be signs of something or someone new in their life. It may not always be the case, but it’s certainly something to look at.
  • Emotional distance: Cheating isn’t just physical. If they’ve grown cold, irritable, or uninterested in your daily life, that emotional disconnection may already be attached elsewhere.
  • A sudden glow-up: New clothes, cologne, skincare routines, or gym memberships can be innocent. However, if the effort suddenly increases without your involvement, it may be intended for someone else.
  • Refusing intimacy or overcompensating: Some cheaters avoid intimacy to dodge guilt. Others ramp up affection to throw you off. Either extreme, if sudden, is worth noticing.
  • Gut instinct: You might not have proof, but you know when something feels off. If you’re constantly anxious or second-guessing yourself, that’s a sign too.

If these behaviors sound familiar, trust your intuition and back it up with facts. Use a people search tool to verify the truth behind your partner’s past or identity. And if you’re concerned they might be hiding a double life, this guide on how to find out if someone is married is a smart place to start.

Do Men or Women Cheat More? Cheating Isn’t Just a Numbers Game

Statistically, men still come out ahead, especially in older age groups. However, the gap is closing fast. Among younger adults, the difference is razor-thin, and emotional cheating has blurred the lines even further.

At the end of the day, it’s less about gender and more about behavior, communication, and trust. Cheating doesn’t look the same for everyone. Some people lie. Some delete. Some just drift away quietly.

If you’re dating someone new or starting to question someone you thought you knew, don’t rely on instinct alone. Utilize the available tools and platforms to verify facts and identify potential red flags before you delve too deeply. 

Cheating hurts, but being unprepared hurts more.

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