Signs of a Cheating Husband

Michelle Wilson - October 15, 2019

Many wives find themselves wondering why their husband’s attitude has suddenly changed, and why they suddenly don’t seem interested in them anymore. For many, this is an early sign that their spouse is cheating on them.

Many women fear the worse when they start to notice little changes in their husband’s behavior. Is he seeing someone else? Am I overreacting? How do I know if he is cheating? These are all good questions and something that should not be left unanswered.

As upsetting as it might be at the thought of your husband cheating on you, there are ways to know for sure if he is seeing someone else or if you are just overthinking. Many cheaters develop certain patterns and behaviors that are easy to spot.

You don’t have to worry about who he is seeing or what he is doing. When you start to notice these little signs, you will be able to decide for yourself if he has moved on to someone else, or if you two just aren’t communicating like you used to.

Why Husband’s Cheat

Cheating is something that should never be justified, but there are reasons that spouses decide to seek the company of another person. This can come from feelings of unimportance, loneliness, and just an all-over sense of failed attempts to rekindle something in the marriage.

If your husband starts to feel like he is no longer important in your life, he might start searching for someone who will make him feel like he is their top priority. This feeling usually starts to develop when a change occurs in the home like you get a more demanding job.

If you have a job or any responsibilities that suddenly keeps you away from home a lot, then he might start to feel lonely. This can happen if a new addition enters the home as well that you might have to spend all of your free time taking care of.

If your husband starts to feel like his efforts to fix and issue in your marriage is going unnoticed or isn’t working, then he might also start to look for comfort in someone outside of the marriage.

By no means should this make you feel like his cheating if your fault, but these are issues that should be openly talked about in the marriage so that everyone feels happy with each other. Communication is key to stopping things like this before they even start.

Signs To Look For

There are many signs to look for that might indicate that your husband is cheating. One or two of these things might not necessarily mean any cheating is going on, but if you notice there a more than a few on this list that describes your husband, you might have cause to be worried.

The reasons you should look for more than one sign has to do with the fact that once you over nervous about cheating, you might start overthinking little things they normally do as suspicious behavior. You always want to be sure before you confront them.

Protective of Their Privacy

When people cheat, they tend to get more protective over their privacy and will act

paranoid about things that seem very minor to you. They can also become very protective of items that they used to not be before.

For example, if they used to leave their phone unattended often and not worry when it would go off, but now they always keep their phone on them and are careful not to let you see the screen, they might be cheating.

If they walk out of a room to take calls and get very quiet when you enter the room or if they hide their computer from you, this could also mean that they are trying to hide a relationship with another person from you.

Becoming Distant

They also might become more distance in the relationship or your sexual life. If their

emotional needs are being fulfilled by someone else; they won’t feel the need to get that from you.

They also might become uninterested in any conversations you might try to hold with them. If they are worried about talking to someone else, or getting away from you so they can be with that person, they might try and rush the conversation as well.

If they were very interested in sex before, but have suddenly lost all desire to be with you, this might also be a sign of cheating. If they are getting sexual fulfillment from another person, they might not seek it with you anymore.

Being Away From The Home A Lot

We all know that a huge red flag when it comes to cheating is when the person doesn’t come home on and time and makes up excuses that don’t match up as to why they were so late. If this becomes a regular thing, it could, in fact, mean they are seeing someone else.

Liking Another Person’s Things On Social Media

Now that we live in an age of social media, this has become one of those signs you might want to look for. If they are someone who likes other people’s content often, this shouldn’t concern you that much.

If you find that your husband was never really active on social media but is recently becoming more active, this could be a sign. Things to look for are liking one person’s content a lot more than others or liking someone new.

Trust Your Instinct

If you have been with your husband for years, you will know when something has changed. Trust your gut. If something seems off, it probably is. At the very least, you can bring the issue up to them. If they get defensive, you might have reasons to be concerned.

How to be Sure

If you think your husband is cheating on you, you are going to want to be sure before taking any action. There are several ways to confirm your suspicions. Some of these methods might be more extreme than others.

Confront Them

Healthy marriages use open communication to work through their issues. If something is different or bothering you, you should always bring it up in a non-threatening manner first. That way if you are wrong, the two of you can work out what is really going on.

If you confront them and they get defensive, then you might have reason to be concerned. People don’t just get defensive when nothing is going on. If they get upset or refuse to talk about it, then they are probably cheating.

Try To Confirm Their Stories

If they are giving you reasons for being out late, you could try to confirm this. If they said they were with another person, you can easily call this person and ask. Just simply mention it in conversation to see if they can confirm.

If they say they are going to a certain location, you could always try to call that place to check. You will need a reason as to why you have called them looking for your husband, but this would let you know for sure if they are doing what they say they are.

You could always just go to the location yourself, or try to go with them. This would eliminate you having to call the place and outing yourself as being nervous about them cheating, in case they are actually there.

Look Through Their Phone

This might be easier said than done. If they are protective of their phone, like most cheaters are, it can be harder to get a hold of it and look through it. This might have to be something you plan out.

They also might have a passcode on it that locks the phone from someone else using it. Most cheaters will take this route as it will ensure their privacy and that no one is looking through their phone that they don’t want.

Use an App

This is one of those extreme measures I was talking about. There are apps you can download on your spouse’s phone that will track their text and send them to your phone.

You will need to hide this app on their phone when you download it. You can also get ones that will track their location if you suspect they are lying to you about where they have been.

This is an invasion of privacy, and if you do this and find out that your spouse isn’t cheating, this could be very bad for your relationship. I would always advice confronting them first and then installing the app if you still think they are cheating.

What to do When You’ve Caught Them Cheating

If you have actually caught them cheating, there are many things you can do once you know for sure. For some, they do not want cheating to be the end of their marriage. If this is you, then there are ways you can work past this. It all just depends on the willingness of your husband.

The first thing you should do is confront them with your evidence. You should do this in a calm manner if you want to work it out. By letting them know that you know, but that you want to try and fix things, you can make a nonthreatening environment to talk about it.

You will need to work through the problems that caused the cheating and rebuild that line of trust between the two of you. The best way to do this is by going through couples therapy. Couples therapy can get down to the source, and all the two of you to rebuild what has been broken.

A therapist is also an unbiased third party that can help the two of you communicate what you are feeling better. Cheating is often a result of poor communication. Learning how to communicate with each other again can go a long way to repairing the damage done.

In some cases, cheating is the end. Either you don’t want to work through it, or they don’t. This is okay. Divorce isn’t something to be ashamed of, and no harm feelings should be held onto during this part.

Admitting that things aren’t working out and going your separate ways is a very healthy thing to do. When you approach your divorce with this type of attitude, things can go a lot smoother and leave the both of you feeling happier.