Are You a Victim of an Emotional Affair?
Linda Collins - September 4, 2019
An emotional affair is a tricky subject isn’t it? After all it’s based mostly on behaviors and not necessarily evidence of anything concrete. It is an affair of the heart and excludes physical intimacy. Emotional affairs often lead to full physical affairs as when the heart wants something different, it often is only a matter of time until it happens.
It’s also tricky as emotional affairs are often with those who on the surface look like friends but with whom they appear to have a certain chemistry with. When you are having an emotional affair, you are often thinking of and maybe even texting with or messaging with this person. You’ll even go as far as to make sure your significant other doesn’t see these conversations or know about them. Maybe you justify it by telling yourself “these aren’t even sexual messages, but they just wouldn’t understand”. You might even be complaining about your partner with this person and comparing them.
There are a few things that might just be red flags you can look out for with your significant other to see if maybe you are a victim of an emotional affair.
Table of Contents
Private Cell Phone
Cheating is cheating is cheating. Whether or not it is physical cheaters will often be quite protective about their cell phones. You will notice they are never without it, and in the very rare instances you are alone with that phone, you find yourself locked out.
You might also see how paranoid they may seem. When you pick up the phone and ask if you can use it, do they recoil and snatch the phone away?
Someone with nothing to hide would never act in such a way. Even if they would, why would you subject yourself to it?
Always The Topic of Conversation
It’s often the case that when someone is having an emotional affair their minds are constantly on that person. In turn it makes it quite hard for conversations to not veer into conversations about that person. When you think about someone on a consistent basis, it is only natural to want to talk about it.
Changing of Physical Style
You’ve known your partner for a while now (presumably). You know their likes, and their dislikes and you know their sense of style. What they find attractive and how they like to present themselves.
It’s not uncommon for cheaters to want to alter their appearance to be more appealing to the new person in their life. It’s something they may have even done when trying to attract you to the relationship.
Maybe it’s in their clothes, or the way they wear their hair. Maybe Mr. Lazy decided all of a sudden to get back to the gym seemingly out of nowhere. What’s that all about?
Working Odd Hours
In some cases some of us have deadlines we have to meet that often create a tricky schedule to manage. But some of us don’t lead these kinds of exciting lives and don’t really need to be burning both ends of the candle.
Have you noticed that your significant other has had drastic changes in their work schedule lately that have caused them to be working late nights? This might not be an effort to make the boss notice them for the next promotion. This could be a tell-tale sign of an affair.
When you first started your relationship it seemed like you two were meant for each other. You would complete each other’s sentences and you would never want to be apart. New love is quite exciting. However, as time marches on, things can mellow quite a bit. But they shouldn’t devolve into discomfort.
You can often feel it when your partner starts to focus their attention and their emotions on other areas of their life. Maybe you’re always feeling like you are walking on thin ice, or they have been more on edge and easy to set off. Are you being compared to others in their life?
When date night seems to be more uncomfortable than anything else it might be time to consider doing something about it.
What You Can Do!
Find personal data including criminal arrest records, current and previous contact details, court documents, employee backgrounds and even hidden social media accounts. You may find information on related and linked people in their past you may not have known about.
Do you have access to your partner’s phone? Try doing reverse phone look ups on suspicious phone numbers that aren’t labeled. Find out who they are, where they live and what social media accounts they have, and see what kind of activity you can uncover through their posts and likes.
Knowing where to look is the key that unlocks all mysteries. Find out who your partner is emotionally having an affair on you with before confronting them with the evidence.